I’ve been to the *$&# Mountain Top!

Well the MacDonalds are hill climbing people, I’ve said that many times. These meaty calves of mine are from ancestors who existed in the Scottish highlands for hundreds of years, no doubt spending their days tending hillside farms and homes.

So, when I was invited to go for a “fun hike” with some teachers from my school I happily accepted, thinking that surely even I could handle hiking here. The mountains that surround us here in Suncheon are mere hills by Canadian standards. No problem!

I began to get a little nervous as we left Suncheon on the highway and began driving through some pretty twisty roads through some mountains that were starting to look pretty daunting. When we arrived at the entrance to the hiking trail, all seemed well but I knew I was in trouble. At least 50 Koreans were milling around throughout the parking lot and these people were completely outfitted. Walking sticks, pristine hiking boots, name-brand everything. My group was 9 people total and glancing around I noticed that they were getting geared up themselves. I was wearing sunglasses, yoga pants and a Sandbanks Fun Run T-shirt, carrying my camera in one hand and my water bottle in the other.

Fast forward about half an hour later… I’m out of breath but doing okay. The trail has become pretty steep but is mostly stairs and still manageable. However, it just won’t end! I find it very hard to describe but I think most people can imagine how I felt. You know when you are just so tired and you keep thinking, “It must end just around this corner” but it just keeps coming. Steeper and steeper until I thought I would have to pull a Radar and fake a pulled muscle. The group stops once for a short break and then continues. Now I am ready to die. I am covered in sweat (the Korean women still look perfectly made-up and if a bead of sweat happens to appear they delicately blot it away with their beautiful hankies) and wipe it off with the neck of my t-shirt when I can. My hair is plastered to my face and neck and I keep stopping to take pictures as an excuse to stop and breathe a bit! My legs refuse to move at some points, I am dizzy and a little light-headed. Mood: bitter.

I finally make it to a small summit where the teachers are waiting only to find out that we are now going to go over the mountain to have lunch! So, now we walk mostly downhill (there is a God!) to a little restaurant on the other side of the mountain. We have our lunch (including plenty of alcohol because who doesn’t want to get liquored up and go climb a mountain?!) and then start walking back over. We decide to go a different way than the way we came and I am faced with at least 200 stairs. I curse Korea, Mountains,Amanda Gale for making me come to this godforsaken place and my own ill health. Finally, FINALLY we make it down the mountain. One of the teachers takes me to show me the temple which is beautiful. I am giddy. All I can think of is my apartment, my shower, my bed! I see the van…. Yes!

This is when I find out that the day (the most physically challenging day of my life) is not over. We have one more stop before we go home. We are going to visit the Grade 3 (middle school Grade 3 is like Grade 9 at home) students and teachers who are on a camping trip. I agree, I really don’t have a choice- how else will I get back to Suncheon? So, off we go. I realize too late that the other car full of teachers went back to Suncheon and watch as we drive by my apartment building (from the highway, there was no way for me to get out!). I curse my own stupidity and want to cry a little.

ONE HOUR and 45 minutes later we arrive at a Youth Hostel where the approx. 300 Grade 3 students are “camping.” We are very kindly welcomed in to the facility to have some dinner. Dinner is… what else? RAW EEL. We are on an island so this is considered a real speciality because it is so fresh. I eat it (it wasn’t bad) and drink the Soju that is inevitably offered to me. Now I am thinking we must be leaving, we must be going home. We are, of course, not leaving.

Because the hostel rooms where the Korean teachers are staying are “too small” we are told to head down to a room in the basement. I have only been in Korea for two weeks but I knew what this meant- drinking. Boy was I right! After doing rounds of shots of scotch and eating more raw fish we finally get ready to leave. Every teacher leaves the basement and comes outside to say goodbye. Twenty minutes later we are on the road, heading back home.
The moral of the story? Don’t ever hike with Koreans.